Money problems run in families. But, I didn’t learn this behavior from my parents. My parents have always been very responsible with their money. Very conservative. They don’t spend it when they don’t have it. And even now that they are doing quite well for themselves, they live frugally. Both of my parents are among the top ranking people in their respective offices and yet, as they both have commented, they drive the oldest cars in the parking lots. All my life, they have modeled good money habits.
That’s why I will never tell them about the debt I am in. Not at least until I am nearly out of it. I can’t even imagine their disappointment in me. Worst of all, they would worry. I have really never disappointed my parents, and I cannot stand to now that I am nearly 26.
So, what happened if I clearly should have known better? I’ll be exploring that as I continue to write this blog. To sum up, I did adopt their good habits and lived with them until I was 22. It was easy, because I worked enough that I always made way more than my expenses. When things were no longer so easy, that’s when I messed up. I continued on as I always had before, but now I had rent to pay and groceries to buy and my little salary couldn’t keep up. I didn’t recognize that I had a problem, because, well, I thought of myself as a responsible girl. It makes no sense, of course, but I was blinded by my own reputation as a responsible and reasonable person. No one would ever expect I could get myself into this kind of trouble. Least of all me.
I am in debt. It’s no one’s fault but my own. But, my parents taught me to work hard and that’s how I’m going to get myself out.
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I am terrible with money. I’m glad you started this blog.
A guy from my work sent me this website because I was asking him questions about saving. I’m not sure if it will help you, but I thought I’d pass it along. These are the “baby steps” and there’s more information on the website, just go back to the homepage.
http://www.daveramsey.com/new/baby-steps/
Ashley, you are one of the most inspirational and wonderful bloggers I know. I just want to give you a hug right now.
*HUGS*
I feel like I’m reading something I wrote – that’s exactly how I feel and what happened to me. Our parents are the same. And that’s why I haven’t told them and refuse to tell them too. It’s hard. We can do it though!
I think that it’s wonderful that you have such a positive attitude towards resolving your debt.
I’ve been in the same situation and I would most certainly never tell my father. He taught me to be fiscally responsible and I can’t imagine the disappointment he’d feel if I told him about my previous debt.
For one thing, he still thinks of me as his little girl. And I know that he’d want to do anything to help me. He might want to step in when I should be learning on my own. Managing money is one of life’s lessons, but so is applying it. I saw sorting out my debt as something that I had to do for myself.
I wish you all the best of luck. I’m sure that you can do it!
Isn’t it bizarre that our parents – er, just my mom really in my case – can set perfectly fine examples of what to do with money and how to handle credit, then we do the polar opposite somewhere along the line?
My parents don’t know about my debt either…
Sometimes I wish my parents didn’t know about our debt but since my mom’s an accountant…it’s nice to get her perspective and friendly lectures to kick the motivation in. It turns out my parents went through the same thing and still are somewhat in debt and only wish for us not to go through the same thing and get out of it NOW while we can.
I know it’s crazy but it’s definitely best to be in debt now while we’re young and not have a family yet. The downside of getting married is adding the debt…his and my credit cards!
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